There is no such being as a human who has never had a problem processing their emotions. We all learned coping strategies early in life and these represented our best effort at trying to minimise our experience of “difficult” feelings.
But we wouldn’t think it was an effective strategy to suck a dummy now, would we? So what would happen if you replaced those immature strategies with new, mature ones that helped you move towards emotional wellbeing? What if you no longer needed to run away or fight your feelings? What if you actually trained yourself to be good at feeling?
I’d like to introduce you to a processing tool that will help you to deal with your emotions in an adult way.
For thousands of years and in almost every culture, the heart has been considered the source of love, courage and wisdom, the true ruler of how we experience life and all human emotion.
Scientists now agree that the heart is much more than a pump. It is a highly complex self-organised information processing centre with its own functional “brain” that communicates with and influences the cranial brain via the nervous system, hormones and other pathways.
These influences profoundly affect brain function and most of the body’s major organs, and ultimately determine our quality of life.
The heart, therefore, has the power to bring brain and body into harmony. HeartHealing is an emotional processing tool that is easy to learn and practise. It harnesses the intelligence of your heart to integrate whatever you are feeling.
Here’s what to do next time you experience a feeling of discomfort, stress, tension or “negative” thinking.
1. If you can, lie down in a comfortable position in a place that you won’t be disturbed, and close your eyes. If you can’t lie down, find a quiet place to sit or stand.
2. See if you can tune in to whereabouts in your body you can feel the discomfort or stress. It might be a tightness or constriction in your throat or solar plexus but it could be anywhere.
3. While focusing on the area in which the sensations are strongest, tell yourself: “What I am experiencing is coming from a part of me that wants to be welcomed and loved.”
4. Breathe into this area and say to it: “I am pleased you are here.”
5. If your mind starts to make judgments about what you’re doing, just notice your thoughts and gently return your attention to the sensations in your body.
6. Now bring your attention to the centre of your chest. Breathe deeply in and out of your heart and allow yourself to feel the energy in this area.
7. Breathe in these positive heart energies and on the out-breath send them to the part of you that is in distress.
8. Continue until the distressed part is integrated. You will know when this has happened because you will feel calm and at peace.
9. In order to get the best results from the HeartHealing process it’s probably best to suspend any disbelief you have and be as sincere as you are able. Your mind doesn’t have to buy into it for it to be effective.
10. If you find it hard to generate positive feelings in your heart, think of someone you love or appreciate and allow the emotion to build in your chest.
HeartHealing can be used in a crowded room without anyone noticing but it’s best if you start off by doing it in a private place.
It works by engaging the heart brain, welcoming and releasing feelings through a simple act of self-love. Don’t worry if you feel daft first time round, it gets easier with practice!
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