How can one comment plunge you back into an old storyline? How does that work? But that’s what happened to me a few weeks ago when a friend emailed me after reading the memoir I wrote almost 10 years ago but which has yet to be published.
I was touched that she had taken the time and trouble to read all of it, as not many people have done so – even the select few to whom I have previously sent the manuscript.
She said she felt a real sense of unhealed heartbreak around the book, which I knew at some deep level but had rarely been able to articulate. But now she had witnessed it, acknowledged it perhaps for the first time, and it catapulted me back into that old emotional memory of feeling so sad and alone, so lost, so despondent that I sometimes couldn’t see the point of living.
I have healed many layers of this hurt but here it was again, rearing up, as real and as painful as it ever was. So much so that I had to lie down and breathe through the tears, allowing myself to feel those feelings of loss.
A buried part of me came up from the depths to find its voice. ‘Help me,’ it said, out loud. I pictured an abandoned child that had been shut away for years in a darkened cupboard, emaciated and grey. I scooped her up and swathed her in a fleecy blanket, telling her she could come out into the light now, that it was safe – I would be there to look after her.
Together, we went out on a walk in the sunshine and a little story unfolded that I told in pictures and words. It was a short journey but a healing one. Today, I feel balanced and back to ‘normal’, wondering what on earth happened there – and remembering there was a clue as I sat by my window that night and bathed in the light of the moon.
In the early hours of April 15 there was a total lunar eclipse. Such cosmic events affect us on an unconscious level and are like portals to greater awareness. Healing of old wounds and patterns can take place at this time as well as powerful endings, closures, clearing out and completion.
I found the following on an astrological website and it really resonated with me: “There is a deep purging and cleansing occurring now. Individuals may be feeling a bit raw, very emotional and even on the verge of grieving something very old or from the distant past. You are responsible for how you choose to interpret things. It’s a wonderful opportunity to clear and heal the heart centre.”
That’s exactly how it felt: as if something very old was coming up for healing. Now it is my responsibility to tell a new story about that time in my life – whether or not I publish my book.
And therein lies the power of rewriting your narrative.
If you need help finding your way out of an old storyline, contact me on info@beverleyglick.com for a free half-hour story mining session.
Hi Beverley
Just to say I found your article and video very interesting but I am still trying to get my mind around the idea of re-writing stories of our lives, after all what happened, happened, it was the truth at that time, or is it that what we think about the situation maybe wasn’t the truth. The idea of re-writing our pasts seems to be about “making something up” that may not be true.. I have always loved writing, and would like to understand this concept better. I am interested in having a free 1/2 hour consultation with you but would I need to bring 1 particular story or how does it work.
Wendy Ibbison
(Human Potential student)
Oh Beverley – yes, this is searing. The possibility that we can heal through writing is so powerful – I think I do that a lot as I write as it allows me to work out my thoughts on my experiences and find new perspectives. Great thought provoking and important blog.
As ever, thank you for your support and encouragement, Rona. There is powerful evidence that we can heal through writing, especially through the work of Dr James Pennebaker – read more here: http://www.utexas.edu/features/archive/2005/writing.html